I came across this statement saying that stars are merely things of the past. We see them up in the sky, but "scientifically", they no longer exist the moment you saw them. I was awe-struck, and curiosity, well, more of a mix of confusion and astonishment bestruck me. If it is in fact a thing of the past, then right here, right now(assuming it is night and the sky is clear) we can see what was. The shining and twinkling bright, sometimes faint light we see up the night sky is around 1 billion years old. Some are around 800 million years. But not all, i would presume. So, if i see a star, the farthest at that, then "scientifically", i would be looking a billion years back and everything in between.
It was last night that i thought, that what if we could travel to that star we see, even if you may not reach it, but at best reach midway, then maybe we could go back to certain times in our lives. Then the childish imagination continued, and i thought, what certain time in my life i would want to go back to. But, if we would be given such outlandish privilege i'm pretty sure it's narrowly limited: maybe? 2 moments? I then confined my backtracks to the two faces of theatrics, the happiest & the saddest moments of my life. Thinking of the impossible possibility, i felt a jolt of excitement. If i could go back to these certain moments i chose, then maybe i can change what I must change, and experience again those blissful times, a nostalgia.
I was then rewinding the pages of my young life. Reminiscing moments and imagining portraits of ecstasy, and teeth-gnawingly trying to skip times where i wished never happened. But, try as i may, even with certain degrees of effort, i just couldn't seem to skip these pages of sadness. But that didn't falter the rousing thought of changing the course of my what is from my what was. Blasting the past, i should say, and reconstructing, or renovating to better put it. But amidst my ecstatic childish imagination of recoursing my past, i just..couldn't think of any. I have reopened, rewinded, and reminisced, but i just can't pinpoint one moment where i'd want to change. I was frustrated and festered by my intolerable lack of decision-making skills. I know i am yet contented with my life, because of things i don't have and things i have had. So if i am not satisfied, why can't i think of things i wish to change?
Then, as i way readying myself to sleep, frustrations behind, i had a eureka moment. You know, something like when a light suddenly turns on above your head moment. I thought, why would i even bother thinking of things to change from my past? Those that had been made me what i am now. Am i happy with now? Apparently not, but would i be if it happened or ended differently? Probably not either.
Things happen, might not be for a reason, but nonetheless it happened. We just cannot undo things, ctrl+z and all. We are in autosave mode(just like this friggin' blog), where every second is saved and dumped in our "past drafts". We have typos and mistakes, but it is through those mistakes that we gain experience; if we don't have errs and bloopers, we won't have something fun to look back to. And for those happy moments, i mean, would you really try changing those times? I will confidently conclude that you won't.
Our pasts are much better left in our memories. Being reminisced and enjoyed only from little electric signals from our brains. We have been given the Hippocampus: a small part of the brain where allegedly stores memories. That is already a privilege in its own little rights, just imagine having none(nothing to reminisce). So the stars we see at night are representations of human life. We can never appreciate those stars if we are near at it, and we'll never gaze at it when it is in grasp. Our past are like these stars(i suppose), much better only being remembered and not altered, for we will never appreciate life when we can indeed refabricate over and over again our insignificant lives. Stars are things of the past, let it remain as that...^_^
